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Book Cover

I’ve been published!…By me.  I’ll explain.

Over the last few months I’ve recognized more and more that my particular aesthetic of creative writing is nowhere near the contemporary market of most publishers.  When even the small independent publishers won’t even touch your stuff that’s when you know you’re either weird or unpublishable or a genius but I don’t know how math works so obviously that last category is out.  As such I had completely given up hope of having my book published, but, nevertheless, I held on to some kind of hope or personal conviction that my book Swanky Panky’s Crazy Wisdom $3.95 would be published in some form or fashion.

It’s at this point in the story that my friend Michael Greenhale stepped forward.  I noticed that he was writing a book because he regularly made Facebook posts about his progress with his manuscript.  I asked him how he was going to go about publishing and he mentioned that he was thinking of self-publishing either through amazon or Kick-starter.  We talked back and forth about it for a while and so I finally screwed up whatever courage I have and looked up the site CreateSpace which is the primary means of publishing through Amazon.

I began configuring my book, getting the cover ready, getting my little sister’s permission to use one of her artworks for the cover, and finally (accidently) publishing the book last night.  As of now I’m published…self-published.  Published nonetheless.

I intend to publish more books as I have a large pile of manuscripts that have been festering away in drawers and, more accurately, flash drives and media files on my computer.  I’ll wait probably a year or more before the next one is published, but for the time being I’ve published the first of what will hopefully be a series of books that center around a character by the name of Swanky Panky.

The book description is below followed by links to CreateSpace and Amazon where, if my dear reader feels so inclined, they can pick up a copy for themselves.  I will also make a new page for White Tower Musings where I will post links to Amazon and Create Space where you can buy all of my books as soon as they are published.

Thank you as always for your time dear reader, and thank you for reading my stories.

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Swanky Panky’s Crazy Wisdom $3.95

A man named Elvis is waiting for a date when a clown enters the bar and tells everyone they can attain “Wisdom” from a man named Swanky Panky for only $5 American.

Elvis, along with everyone at the bar, decides to take a chance, and at the parking garage across the street they find three rings and a strange man who carries a bucket of bells and an empty chest.  Once Swanky’s been paid Elvis and the crowd sit down and Swanky summons people from his bucket and his chest who tell strange and weird and wonderful and horrible stories. Cover ammazon

A man is haunted by an invisible rat, a lesbian pornstar is inspired by a lightbulb, a man named Dr. Pepper is harassed by a lunatic named Mountain Dew, a man made of molecules dances, a young woman struggles with a can opener, a sun falls in love and has her heartbroken, a redneck wins glory everlasting in a contest against a rattlesnake, and these are just some of the endless tales that offer Swanky’s Wisdom.

Between the acts of the show Elvis meets some of the people in the garage with him, but it’s a man named Atlas that leaves a distinct impression.  Elvis talks with Atlas, and even with Swanky Panky himself, and with the stories from the show Elvis finds his wisdom and has to decide what it will mean for the rest of his life.


Buy the books by following the links below:








Amazon Kindle (E-Book)



The cover illustration is Vespasiano care of my sister Mary Elizabeth Smith.  Thanks Emers, you’re fucking awesome!  Thanks also to Michael Greenhale for your endless encouragement, I wouldn’t have gotten this far without you man!